Psalm 37: 4-5 "Delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will act."
There are about 6 different applications I can think of here, but once again, I'm talking mainly to singles...
As a group of single guys, we were recently chatting about one of our favorite topics (that would be you, ladies) and one of the guys got that glazed over look on his face as he was describing "her". Yep, that young woman that he was completely focused on and while she was single, she was not reciprocating his feelings. Still, like most of us, he had placed her on a pedestal so high and convinced himself that she was worth waiting for. We've all been there. Heck, some of us are there now! There's a couple of problems with this mindset though.
First, placing another human being on a pedestal like that sets them up as an idol in your mind. When they disappoint you or you finally get tired of waiting on him/her, it's easy to become depressed and bitter from the disappointment. Even if it works out, you've made them a god by your worship. You've got to remember that they are just as human and broken as you are. That time you spend waiting for them to see the relationship the way you do would be much better spent developing a friendship and getting to know them on a much deeper level in an environment where you can both be yourselves. Allow yourself to be be known and to get to know the real him/her.
The other issue I have is that one of you is waiting for the other one. In many ways, you're placing your life in neutral while the other person is still developing to whatever it is he or she is becoming. News flash - you don't control their development. Like the first scenario, you have placed your focus and hope on that relationship and you will be disappointed. What's worse, is you have neglected the development of your own relationship with Christ in the process.
Look, I know she's a phenomenal lady and he's an awesome guy, especially if they belong to Christ. There is a reason your paths crossed, no doubt. God is trying to teach you something or develop your character through the experience. That doesn't guarantee that those paths coincide with each other in your pursuit of Christ from that point forward though. Time will tell, but to stop your pursuit of Christ in order to pursue the object of your affection only shows your ability to give in to the temptations of a human idol.
Take some encouragement from this though: if not her or him, then it is someone even better. We are all in a constant state of preparation for different aspects of our lives, but our Lord who is preparing us has an infinitely greater perspective than we do. I promise you there is no more beautiful a lady than one who loves Christ with all her heart and there is no more amazing a guy than one who pursues Him ahead of any woman. When you have a genuine relationship with Christ, it oozes out of every aspect of your life and people, especially the opposite sex, really want to be around people like that. Remember, He promised to give us the desires of our heart when our heart is finding delight in Him.
One last thing - I love the back half of that verse. Commit your ways to the Lord, trust in Him, and He will act. It doesn't say He'll listen a little closer or put you in the fast pass prayer lane. No, it says He will act. You've got some good reasons to give this up to Him. The only question that remains is if you think you've still got this love thing figured out better than the One who invented it!
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Thursday, May 1, 2014
She's All That... and More
I don't really remember the details of the first time I met her. I'm pretty sure it was after a soccer match and she had told me "nice game" as I passed her in the hallway. I muttered a "thanks", but I didn't really want to be seen talking to her. After all, I was the star player, likely MVP, and probably playing college ball somewhere if I didn't get injured. She was a tiny little thing; bespectacled and dressed in clothes that definitely weren't in style and hid the figure she probably didn't have. Still, she always said something nice to me when I saw her. I almost felt bad for her, it was like she had a crush on me or something, but she really wasn't my type. Honestly, I didn't think I'd hear the end of it from my friends if I actually got caught talking to her.
Then came "The Game". Yeah, we were poised to move into the state championship match and full of confidence as we were up against a team we'd beaten soundly earlier in the year. Not only did we lose, but I put the ball in my own net as time was set to expire, giving our opponents the victory instead of going to overtime. Overnight, people crossed to the other side of the hallway, my girlfriend broke up with me, and I was suddenly a nobody. Even my teammates avoided me. Yet, when I passed her in the hallway, she tried to encourage me by reminding me that it wasn't my fault. It didn't really help, but I kind of appreciated that she tried.
As my former friends began to isolate me more and more, I found that I actually looked forward to seeing her. People started making fun of me, but I'd make a point to smile at her, knowing she'd always say something nice when she saw me. When prom approached, not only was Prom King out of the question for me, I couldn't even find a date. I'd asked a lot of girls and gotten a few dirty looks and a whole lot of laughs. I was sitting behind the stands at the soccer field feeling completely useless when she appeared. I didn't even think she knew there was a field much less how to get to it, but there she was. I looked around to make sure no one else could see us before finally greeting her.
She gently took my hand in hers and said something I'll never forget. "I know you're hurting, but I want you to know that I still think you're fantastic." Then she let it go and started to leave. I called out for her to wait and ran over to her. The words were out of my mouth before I knew what I was saying - "How would you like to go to prom with me?" Her face lit up, and suddenly, there was a beauty in her eyes that I had never noticed before. "Of course! I'd love to go with you!" I think she might have even giggled a little bit.
As the day approached, I began to get nervous. The harassment I'd been subjected to so far would be nothing compared to me walking into to prom with her. I thought about faking sick to get out of going, but I couldn't make myself do it. I finally told myself to suck it up and do it. She deserved that much for being so nice to me after everyone else turned. So I rented a tux. I went for the cheapest one I could find. After all, this wasn't going anywhere and I didn't really want to get her hopes up by going all out.
I went to the address that she gave me to pick her up. I didn't really know what to expect... a trailer maybe? You can imagine my surprise when I had to be screened by a security guard before the gates opened and allowed me into the driveway of her parents' mansion. Mansion might not be a good enough description. Estate? Manor? Chateau? They all seem too tame for her home. Now I was thoroughly sweating. What would her parents think of me? They'd surely see right through my lack of effort for their daughter.
The butler answered the door before I could even knock on it, took my jacket, and escorted me in. I cursed in my mind - I hadn't even remembered to get a corsage. Her parents greeted me warmly and seemed so genuine. I tried to think of how I was supposed to apologize or how I could somehow make up for my indifference to their daughter, but the sincerity of their warmness to me was more than I could handle. I finally tried to explain that I shouldn't be there, that their daughter was better than I deserved, and that I should leave - I just wanted to get out of there. I started to tell them about my ex-girlfriends and what I was really like, but her Father forestalled me.
"We know everything there is to know about you. Don't ask how, but we have sources that you can not possibly imagine," her Father told me. "Then clearly you understand that I should not be out with your daughter, particularly on prom night," I protested. Her Father put his hands up, "Nonsense. She chose you and that is all there is to it. Your past is of no concern to us now that she is set on you." I think I was in the middle of a thought when she started making her way down the stairs...
Oh. My. Word.
She didn't just look good for her, she was beautiful. Beautiful in ways that words can't describe. So beautiful that a tear trickled down my eye just looking at her. No glasses, no baggy clothes. She was slender and toned. Her dress fit her form perfectly. She moved with all the grace of a professional dancer. Her smile was infectious. Her eyes were locked on mine and I couldn't look away if I'd wanted to. Suddenly the thought of saying she was too good for me wasn't just an excuse to leave, it was the truth. There was no way that such a beautiful lady should be with an arrogant scum like myself. She deserved something so much better.
She kissed her father on the cheek and hugged her mother. Her parents wished us a good evening and I wasn't sure if I could even stop shaking enough to open the door for her. The evening was perfect. I have no idea what the others thought. I couldn't even tell you who else was there that night. For me, she was the only other person in the room and I wasn't about to take my eyes away from hers.
I really didn't know what to do when I walked her back to her porch to say good night. Should I hold her hand? Can I hug her? Kiss her on the hand? The cheek? What do I even say? She took care of all of that. Even though her parents were looking through the window from the kitchen, she took my hands in hers, kissed me on the cheek, and thanked me for a wonderful evening. I couldn't take it anymore. "I didn't go all in for you though," I explained, "I could have done so much more, but you were the amazing one. You're more beautiful than I ever could have imagined and you've treated me so much better than I deserve. I should be thanking you."
She smiled and told me she'd see me at school on Monday. As she went inside, I waved and said goodnight to her and her parents. I'd made myself a promise that if this wasn't a dream, I'd ask her out on Monday as soon as I saw her. I tried my hardest to stay awake, reliving every moment of the night. I was afraid that if I went to sleep, I'd wake up to find it had all been a dream... a wonderful dream, but just a dream.
Monday, no one really said much to me. Well, maybe they did, I don't really know. I was focused on this tiny little bespectacled young lady wearing clothes that were definitely not in style. When I finally saw her at the end of the hall, I sort of broke into a run and tripped over someone's backpack. As laughter fell all around me, a gentle hand reached out to mine and I saw the kindness and beauty in her eyes again. Even though the others saw the same girl that had been in the hallway last week, I had seen her true beauty and there was no way a pair of glasses and baggy clothes could make me forget.
Before I could even say "thanks", it was like she had read all the insecurities in my mind. "I know you haven't always noticed me, but I've noticed you. I've been at all of your games and practices, even if you weren't looking to see if I was there. I know I'm different from all your other girlfriends. I know that other people make fun of you for talking to me. I know you only asked me to prom as a reaction and didn't really want to go at first. I know that it was only after you saw my house and how I looked all dressed up that you were really attracted to me. It's okay. Even if you hadn't asked me to prom or were trying to figure out how to ask me out now, I'd still be there in the shadows, whispering encouragement to you on the way by, and hoping you would notice me."
My jaw dropped and for the second time, tears filled my eyes, this time out of guilt. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. Was I really that transparent?
"The answer is yes, by the way," she said. Before I could even process what she was referring to, she clarified, "Yes, I want to go out with you and I want to be around your friends and family." I shook my head in disbelief of what I was hearing. It was more than I could have possibly hoped for, yet there she was, speaking every word of it. "Oh, and Dad, yeah, you can call Him Dad, says that our home is yours as well and that He expects you over for family dinner." Most people might have been a bit freaked out by that, but I actually found it comforting. It was like I was being adopted and even though I had been an arrogant, self-centered jerk that had never once treated a girl the way she deserved, it was the simple choice of the lady before me that had made me accepted by her Father.
That's when the most terrifying and wonderful thing happened. She looked at me with a tear threatening to fall from her eye and said, "I know that hearing me say "I love you" will never be enough, and there will come a day when you take me for granted. I will still extend my love to you. There will be a day when you will turn away from me, but I will still extend my love for you. There will come a time when someone looks more attractive to you despite my best efforts to show you my beauty, but I will still extend my love for you. There will be a day when you choose her over me and stay with her until you have had long enough to realize how much I mean to you, and during that time, I will still extend my love to you and I will accept you with open arms and no questions when you return. You will betray me with your words and your actions, but I will extend my love for you anyway. You will cause me to suffer greatly, but I will extend my love for you anyway."
I wanted to protest against her accusations, but something told me she was right. What kind of love was this? Who would choose to love this way? Who would choose a liar and a cheater with open arms? Who could possibly give all of herself in love to someone that barely noticed her then and will surely stray later? Who would understand the pain of betrayal and choose to bear it anyway? How could a lady so perfect choose to be with someone like me?
It defies all logic. It defies the way I learned that things work. It's not normal. No matter how many times I admit my fear that her promises aren't true, doubt she can really love someone like me, and am caught up by someone or something that promises to be better but never is, she reassures and comforts me. I can be completely open with her and she doesn't reject me for my past. She doesn't reject me for my thoughts I know I ought not to have. She doesn't reject me when I stumble and fall.
She is patient, gentle, and kind. She does not boast in the knowledge that she is greater than me nor seek someone else over me. She is humble; not arrogant or rude. She does not insist on getting her own way, but always gives me the choice. She does not resent the freedom she offers me and does not become irritated by my failures to love her the way she loves me. She always speaks truth and lights up when I learn it or apply it. She gladly bears the burden of my past without complaint or using it against me, she believes the best in me always, she has true hope that I will choose her over the temptations that others offer ,and endures with grace my seasons of trouble. Her love is in every way perfect, and though I may wonder how and when it will end, she is faithful in every way to continue to extend it with no hint of ceasing.
Epilogue:
For most of you, you already see the allegory to Christ's love for us here. Some of you may be thinking that I managed to find the perfect girl, or that you want to know if she has a brother. The fact is that I have found a perfect love. Perhaps more appropriately, I have been pursued by One who has a perfect love.
If you have an authentic relationship with Christ, this story should resonate within you. If you have been faking it, you're probably telling yourself something like, "I don't know where he gets all that from, I'm certainly not loved that way." If you have no desire to have a relationship with Christ or don't know even where to begin, I probably made Him sound like a creepy stalker.
If I could somehow open your eyes to see the world the way Christ has graciously allowed me to begin to, you'd see Him throughout the course of your day, everywhere you go. You'd hear Him whisper to you the encouragement you need to hear.
And when you finally say, "Yes, Lord, I want You in my life", it's a game changer like you've never before considered. Your struggles will become more real than you ever imagined, but His love will be extended in way you never thought possible. You will begin to recognize the arrogance and selfishness in yourself, and though you are ashamed, you will crave His presence and His unfailing love. You will learn that when you run to Him, you are always accepted with open arms, even when you trip along the way. You will experience the love that all of us "Jesus Freaks" can't shut up about.
Make no mistake though: you must choose Him. He will pursue you until death, but He will not force you to take Him. If this inspires questions, I've got answers. Ask. If I don't know the answer, there are some phenomenal people around me that do. We want you to experience the love and the life change that goes along with it. If you don't want to ask some strange guy that posts some almost entertaining and sometimes thought provoking writing online, look around for a church, group, or individual that is excited about Jesus, ask those questions, and hold on for the ride. It's going to be a party like you and I have never experienced, but none of us can do it on our own!
Then came "The Game". Yeah, we were poised to move into the state championship match and full of confidence as we were up against a team we'd beaten soundly earlier in the year. Not only did we lose, but I put the ball in my own net as time was set to expire, giving our opponents the victory instead of going to overtime. Overnight, people crossed to the other side of the hallway, my girlfriend broke up with me, and I was suddenly a nobody. Even my teammates avoided me. Yet, when I passed her in the hallway, she tried to encourage me by reminding me that it wasn't my fault. It didn't really help, but I kind of appreciated that she tried.
As my former friends began to isolate me more and more, I found that I actually looked forward to seeing her. People started making fun of me, but I'd make a point to smile at her, knowing she'd always say something nice when she saw me. When prom approached, not only was Prom King out of the question for me, I couldn't even find a date. I'd asked a lot of girls and gotten a few dirty looks and a whole lot of laughs. I was sitting behind the stands at the soccer field feeling completely useless when she appeared. I didn't even think she knew there was a field much less how to get to it, but there she was. I looked around to make sure no one else could see us before finally greeting her.
She gently took my hand in hers and said something I'll never forget. "I know you're hurting, but I want you to know that I still think you're fantastic." Then she let it go and started to leave. I called out for her to wait and ran over to her. The words were out of my mouth before I knew what I was saying - "How would you like to go to prom with me?" Her face lit up, and suddenly, there was a beauty in her eyes that I had never noticed before. "Of course! I'd love to go with you!" I think she might have even giggled a little bit.
As the day approached, I began to get nervous. The harassment I'd been subjected to so far would be nothing compared to me walking into to prom with her. I thought about faking sick to get out of going, but I couldn't make myself do it. I finally told myself to suck it up and do it. She deserved that much for being so nice to me after everyone else turned. So I rented a tux. I went for the cheapest one I could find. After all, this wasn't going anywhere and I didn't really want to get her hopes up by going all out.
I went to the address that she gave me to pick her up. I didn't really know what to expect... a trailer maybe? You can imagine my surprise when I had to be screened by a security guard before the gates opened and allowed me into the driveway of her parents' mansion. Mansion might not be a good enough description. Estate? Manor? Chateau? They all seem too tame for her home. Now I was thoroughly sweating. What would her parents think of me? They'd surely see right through my lack of effort for their daughter.
The butler answered the door before I could even knock on it, took my jacket, and escorted me in. I cursed in my mind - I hadn't even remembered to get a corsage. Her parents greeted me warmly and seemed so genuine. I tried to think of how I was supposed to apologize or how I could somehow make up for my indifference to their daughter, but the sincerity of their warmness to me was more than I could handle. I finally tried to explain that I shouldn't be there, that their daughter was better than I deserved, and that I should leave - I just wanted to get out of there. I started to tell them about my ex-girlfriends and what I was really like, but her Father forestalled me.
"We know everything there is to know about you. Don't ask how, but we have sources that you can not possibly imagine," her Father told me. "Then clearly you understand that I should not be out with your daughter, particularly on prom night," I protested. Her Father put his hands up, "Nonsense. She chose you and that is all there is to it. Your past is of no concern to us now that she is set on you." I think I was in the middle of a thought when she started making her way down the stairs...
Oh. My. Word.
She didn't just look good for her, she was beautiful. Beautiful in ways that words can't describe. So beautiful that a tear trickled down my eye just looking at her. No glasses, no baggy clothes. She was slender and toned. Her dress fit her form perfectly. She moved with all the grace of a professional dancer. Her smile was infectious. Her eyes were locked on mine and I couldn't look away if I'd wanted to. Suddenly the thought of saying she was too good for me wasn't just an excuse to leave, it was the truth. There was no way that such a beautiful lady should be with an arrogant scum like myself. She deserved something so much better.
She kissed her father on the cheek and hugged her mother. Her parents wished us a good evening and I wasn't sure if I could even stop shaking enough to open the door for her. The evening was perfect. I have no idea what the others thought. I couldn't even tell you who else was there that night. For me, she was the only other person in the room and I wasn't about to take my eyes away from hers.
I really didn't know what to do when I walked her back to her porch to say good night. Should I hold her hand? Can I hug her? Kiss her on the hand? The cheek? What do I even say? She took care of all of that. Even though her parents were looking through the window from the kitchen, she took my hands in hers, kissed me on the cheek, and thanked me for a wonderful evening. I couldn't take it anymore. "I didn't go all in for you though," I explained, "I could have done so much more, but you were the amazing one. You're more beautiful than I ever could have imagined and you've treated me so much better than I deserve. I should be thanking you."
She smiled and told me she'd see me at school on Monday. As she went inside, I waved and said goodnight to her and her parents. I'd made myself a promise that if this wasn't a dream, I'd ask her out on Monday as soon as I saw her. I tried my hardest to stay awake, reliving every moment of the night. I was afraid that if I went to sleep, I'd wake up to find it had all been a dream... a wonderful dream, but just a dream.
Monday, no one really said much to me. Well, maybe they did, I don't really know. I was focused on this tiny little bespectacled young lady wearing clothes that were definitely not in style. When I finally saw her at the end of the hall, I sort of broke into a run and tripped over someone's backpack. As laughter fell all around me, a gentle hand reached out to mine and I saw the kindness and beauty in her eyes again. Even though the others saw the same girl that had been in the hallway last week, I had seen her true beauty and there was no way a pair of glasses and baggy clothes could make me forget.
Before I could even say "thanks", it was like she had read all the insecurities in my mind. "I know you haven't always noticed me, but I've noticed you. I've been at all of your games and practices, even if you weren't looking to see if I was there. I know I'm different from all your other girlfriends. I know that other people make fun of you for talking to me. I know you only asked me to prom as a reaction and didn't really want to go at first. I know that it was only after you saw my house and how I looked all dressed up that you were really attracted to me. It's okay. Even if you hadn't asked me to prom or were trying to figure out how to ask me out now, I'd still be there in the shadows, whispering encouragement to you on the way by, and hoping you would notice me."
My jaw dropped and for the second time, tears filled my eyes, this time out of guilt. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. Was I really that transparent?
"The answer is yes, by the way," she said. Before I could even process what she was referring to, she clarified, "Yes, I want to go out with you and I want to be around your friends and family." I shook my head in disbelief of what I was hearing. It was more than I could have possibly hoped for, yet there she was, speaking every word of it. "Oh, and Dad, yeah, you can call Him Dad, says that our home is yours as well and that He expects you over for family dinner." Most people might have been a bit freaked out by that, but I actually found it comforting. It was like I was being adopted and even though I had been an arrogant, self-centered jerk that had never once treated a girl the way she deserved, it was the simple choice of the lady before me that had made me accepted by her Father.
That's when the most terrifying and wonderful thing happened. She looked at me with a tear threatening to fall from her eye and said, "I know that hearing me say "I love you" will never be enough, and there will come a day when you take me for granted. I will still extend my love to you. There will be a day when you will turn away from me, but I will still extend my love for you. There will come a time when someone looks more attractive to you despite my best efforts to show you my beauty, but I will still extend my love for you. There will be a day when you choose her over me and stay with her until you have had long enough to realize how much I mean to you, and during that time, I will still extend my love to you and I will accept you with open arms and no questions when you return. You will betray me with your words and your actions, but I will extend my love for you anyway. You will cause me to suffer greatly, but I will extend my love for you anyway."
I wanted to protest against her accusations, but something told me she was right. What kind of love was this? Who would choose to love this way? Who would choose a liar and a cheater with open arms? Who could possibly give all of herself in love to someone that barely noticed her then and will surely stray later? Who would understand the pain of betrayal and choose to bear it anyway? How could a lady so perfect choose to be with someone like me?
It defies all logic. It defies the way I learned that things work. It's not normal. No matter how many times I admit my fear that her promises aren't true, doubt she can really love someone like me, and am caught up by someone or something that promises to be better but never is, she reassures and comforts me. I can be completely open with her and she doesn't reject me for my past. She doesn't reject me for my thoughts I know I ought not to have. She doesn't reject me when I stumble and fall.
She is patient, gentle, and kind. She does not boast in the knowledge that she is greater than me nor seek someone else over me. She is humble; not arrogant or rude. She does not insist on getting her own way, but always gives me the choice. She does not resent the freedom she offers me and does not become irritated by my failures to love her the way she loves me. She always speaks truth and lights up when I learn it or apply it. She gladly bears the burden of my past without complaint or using it against me, she believes the best in me always, she has true hope that I will choose her over the temptations that others offer ,and endures with grace my seasons of trouble. Her love is in every way perfect, and though I may wonder how and when it will end, she is faithful in every way to continue to extend it with no hint of ceasing.
Epilogue:
For most of you, you already see the allegory to Christ's love for us here. Some of you may be thinking that I managed to find the perfect girl, or that you want to know if she has a brother. The fact is that I have found a perfect love. Perhaps more appropriately, I have been pursued by One who has a perfect love.
If you have an authentic relationship with Christ, this story should resonate within you. If you have been faking it, you're probably telling yourself something like, "I don't know where he gets all that from, I'm certainly not loved that way." If you have no desire to have a relationship with Christ or don't know even where to begin, I probably made Him sound like a creepy stalker.
If I could somehow open your eyes to see the world the way Christ has graciously allowed me to begin to, you'd see Him throughout the course of your day, everywhere you go. You'd hear Him whisper to you the encouragement you need to hear.
And when you finally say, "Yes, Lord, I want You in my life", it's a game changer like you've never before considered. Your struggles will become more real than you ever imagined, but His love will be extended in way you never thought possible. You will begin to recognize the arrogance and selfishness in yourself, and though you are ashamed, you will crave His presence and His unfailing love. You will learn that when you run to Him, you are always accepted with open arms, even when you trip along the way. You will experience the love that all of us "Jesus Freaks" can't shut up about.
Make no mistake though: you must choose Him. He will pursue you until death, but He will not force you to take Him. If this inspires questions, I've got answers. Ask. If I don't know the answer, there are some phenomenal people around me that do. We want you to experience the love and the life change that goes along with it. If you don't want to ask some strange guy that posts some almost entertaining and sometimes thought provoking writing online, look around for a church, group, or individual that is excited about Jesus, ask those questions, and hold on for the ride. It's going to be a party like you and I have never experienced, but none of us can do it on our own!
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
The Skeptic's Schism
I Peter 3:13 - 17
13 Now who is there to harm you if you are zealous for what is good? 14 But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, 15 but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy,always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, 16 having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame. 17 For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God's will, than for doing evil.
Ask most adult singles that have been around the dating scene for any length of time what they most want in a guy/girl and you're likely to hear the word "authenticity" uttered more than any other. Ask the same question of voters in an election year about candidates and it'll be the same. With people in our lives and leaders in our government constantly lacking authenticity when their words and actions don't match, we have become a very skeptical society. In fact, we're more likely to try and read between the words of a person rather than take them at face value.
This is a major challenge for born again/authentically changed Christians. For example, I'm a pretty vanilla kind of guy. I'm more likely to be soaking in the conversation rather than leading it. I love learning about the other person and their experiences even though it makes for kind of a boring date (sorry about that, by the way). On the other hand, start a conversation about Christ and what He's done in our lives and I get excited. I'm laughing, giving high fives, and acting like the life of the party when that comes around. I love hearing about your experience, but I also love to share my own. Why? Because I'm excited about what Christ has done! Really, genuinely, authentically excited! That subject is more important to me than any other because it's the only one that has eternal consequences.
Peter here though warns that our hope and excitement, even though authentic, is going to be met with skepticism. People that haven't experienced the change first hand have a hard time understanding it and fall back on the skepticism that defines our culture. It creates a division between us; a schism. If we're being authentic though, we've done nothing wrong and have nothing to be sorry for. However, we should be careful to make sure that our words and actions match. This world is always looking for a way to accuse the righteous and justify its skepticism. We're never going to be perfect in this world, but we can be authentic even when we stumble. Pray constantly for your heart to be changed to one of service to Christ. If you're genuine with Him, it will show up in your life, and any accusers you may have will all look foolish when people realize there's no truth to dig up - it's been on the surface for everyone to see from the beginning.
This is a major challenge for born again/authentically changed Christians. For example, I'm a pretty vanilla kind of guy. I'm more likely to be soaking in the conversation rather than leading it. I love learning about the other person and their experiences even though it makes for kind of a boring date (sorry about that, by the way). On the other hand, start a conversation about Christ and what He's done in our lives and I get excited. I'm laughing, giving high fives, and acting like the life of the party when that comes around. I love hearing about your experience, but I also love to share my own. Why? Because I'm excited about what Christ has done! Really, genuinely, authentically excited! That subject is more important to me than any other because it's the only one that has eternal consequences.
Peter here though warns that our hope and excitement, even though authentic, is going to be met with skepticism. People that haven't experienced the change first hand have a hard time understanding it and fall back on the skepticism that defines our culture. It creates a division between us; a schism. If we're being authentic though, we've done nothing wrong and have nothing to be sorry for. However, we should be careful to make sure that our words and actions match. This world is always looking for a way to accuse the righteous and justify its skepticism. We're never going to be perfect in this world, but we can be authentic even when we stumble. Pray constantly for your heart to be changed to one of service to Christ. If you're genuine with Him, it will show up in your life, and any accusers you may have will all look foolish when people realize there's no truth to dig up - it's been on the surface for everyone to see from the beginning.
Saturday, April 26, 2014
Looking for "The One"
I told myself that I was going to get off of singles-based blog posts and try to get back to writing things that are a little more universally applicable... then I came across a story that was just WAY too good to pass up.
Remember that old phrase, "takes one to know one"? I always kind of wondered about that in the back of my mind - If God is gracious enough for me to have a lady in my life once more, what kind of person is going to accept someone like me? And though my mind wanders to all of the different things that make up who I am, it always settles on the same question: does she have to be broken like I was in order for is to have a solid relationship? I keep coming to the conclusion that if she hasn't, she won't possibly be able to understand me.
Turns out I'm looking at this all wrong as usual. Sure, I'm a triathlete, a father, a traitor, and betrayer, but I've forgotten what actually defines me. I am a redeemed child of the Most High God. Period. Exclamation point. The fact that I belong to Jesus is the only defining characteristic.
2 Corinthians 5:17 - "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away, behold the new has come."
So there is a "takes one to know one" mentality here, but the questions that really need to be asked are different. Has he or she experienced real change because of Jesus in her life? That's it. Real change negates the past. Real change can bring together any two people, regardless of who they were. It doesn't have to just be a romance, either. Real change bonds brothers and sisters closer than anything else possibly can.
So maybe that Spanish lady named Margarita who makes a good one and wants to rub my feet while listening to my mile splits after a long run isn't actually "the one" I'm looking for. We can stop looking for "the one" and only look for The One who is evident in his or her life. God might just surprise you with the type of person you find The One in, but guaranteed, he or she is going to be amazing for you and amazed by you when you are both truly focused on Christ.
The inspiration for this came from another blog post, "My Wife Has Tattoos: Marriage, New Birth, and the Gospel" by Spencer Harmon and it is absolutely worth the time to read. I eluded to some of this on my post, "What's Your Type?" and I hope you'll go back and read that if you haven't already.
Thursday, April 24, 2014
Treason and the Traitor - Epilogue
Treason and the Traitor is more than just a short story, it is a metaphorical telling of my own testimony. Many of the greatest testimonies in the Bible and historically are built around personal tragedy, and a great percentage of those due to our own choices. Consider Paul or David for example. For those of us that have a shameful past, it's hard to share the details of our testimony. Let's face it, the antagonist is someone that we hate, but that person is who we once were.
When the telling of our testimony requires us to remember the things we hate about our former selves and we have not gained the confidence from sharing openly with tons of people, it's terrifying. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited about the work that Christ has done in my life and I want everyone to know His love, pursuit, and faithfulness! There's still fear there though, fear of being seen as who you once were but no longer are. There is a real fear that we are not worthy of being loved and accepted once people discover what we are scared to reveal.
With time, it does get better. As God offers opportunities to share, your confidence in His ability to use that story to reach someone grows. People that have experienced their own tragedy are easy to tell it to because they have felt the redeeming love of Christ and they tend to be genuinely excited for you to be experiencing that love as well. It's similar with those that willingly gave control of their lives up and know that change is real. The scary ones are those that don't believe real change can happen because they haven't experienced it and can't see it. We're fearful of being not only rejected, but condemned by them.
Personally, I wish I had the courage to share my testimony with everyone, having no fear of rejection and knowing that my value is in Christ. Even though I realize that the telling of that story reduces my significance and brings glory to the One responsible for my salvation, the reality is that I am still untrusting in many ways.
So I tell you all this to make this point - it is worth the time to get to know those people that you know have a past they aren't telling you about but obviously love Christ with their lives. It takes time to build the trust necessary to get inside those barriers, but remind them that you love them for who they are, aren't rejecting them for the old self that was tossed aside, and that you are excited to learn what Christ has done in their lives. Then watch them open up. They (and I) will gain the confidence to share more and more. You'll get to hear a modern day story that proves Christ is still winning souls and is alive and well. Because of your willingness to love on someone that is scared, you'll empower them to continue spreading the good news. Even though the story isn't your own, your simple act of love will be responsible for reaching people that would not have heard it otherwise.
One last thing, if this is the first post you're reading, please go back and read parts I and II.
When the telling of our testimony requires us to remember the things we hate about our former selves and we have not gained the confidence from sharing openly with tons of people, it's terrifying. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited about the work that Christ has done in my life and I want everyone to know His love, pursuit, and faithfulness! There's still fear there though, fear of being seen as who you once were but no longer are. There is a real fear that we are not worthy of being loved and accepted once people discover what we are scared to reveal.
With time, it does get better. As God offers opportunities to share, your confidence in His ability to use that story to reach someone grows. People that have experienced their own tragedy are easy to tell it to because they have felt the redeeming love of Christ and they tend to be genuinely excited for you to be experiencing that love as well. It's similar with those that willingly gave control of their lives up and know that change is real. The scary ones are those that don't believe real change can happen because they haven't experienced it and can't see it. We're fearful of being not only rejected, but condemned by them.
Personally, I wish I had the courage to share my testimony with everyone, having no fear of rejection and knowing that my value is in Christ. Even though I realize that the telling of that story reduces my significance and brings glory to the One responsible for my salvation, the reality is that I am still untrusting in many ways.
So I tell you all this to make this point - it is worth the time to get to know those people that you know have a past they aren't telling you about but obviously love Christ with their lives. It takes time to build the trust necessary to get inside those barriers, but remind them that you love them for who they are, aren't rejecting them for the old self that was tossed aside, and that you are excited to learn what Christ has done in their lives. Then watch them open up. They (and I) will gain the confidence to share more and more. You'll get to hear a modern day story that proves Christ is still winning souls and is alive and well. Because of your willingness to love on someone that is scared, you'll empower them to continue spreading the good news. Even though the story isn't your own, your simple act of love will be responsible for reaching people that would not have heard it otherwise.
One last thing, if this is the first post you're reading, please go back and read parts I and II.
Wednesday, April 23, 2014
Treason and the Traitor - Part II
The truth is, I was never qualified to command this ship. It was false documentation that I provided to gain the captaincy. It was designed to be piloted by One who is skilled in navigating the waters in both calm and stormy seas. It was supposed to be sailed by One who did not look lovingly at the detail in which the vessel was built for His own gain, but who loved the ship itself for its incredible craftsmanship and understood its design. Only the One who built it from the first plank to final sail could know this ship well enough to navigate it through the entirety of its voyage.
I prepared for the end, I laid on the deck crying and wondered how painful it would be to die. I considered taking my own life on my own terms rather than allow it to be taken from me. As I gave myself up for lost, the storm subsided. A Man I had never invited on my journey, but spoke of as if He had been to satisfy those on board, was at the wheel...
...and I was terrified by His presence.
He somehow avoided the rocks and righted the ship. All that was damaged seemed to be as fresh as the day she first touched the water. He made her new again. Humbly, I offered the True Captain my sword and begged Him to take my life as punishment for my crimes. Gently and kindly, He embraced me. "Now that I have your heart," He said, "I can make a good sailor out of you. Although there will be scars, I will heal the pain, and now I can use you to reach others. You have always been valuable beyond measure to me, and now you can experience the extent of My love."
Some people see me as a slave to my Captain, but I have been set free. Some say there is still mutiny in my heart, but I take every emotion to my Savior and He brings me comfort and encouragement. People wonder when I will tire of glorifying and praising my Lord, but He gives me strength and courage to continue each day.
The people that sail with me now know who I have been, they know who I am, and they know that they are two very different people. As my Captain has released the wheel back to me, He is never far away to guide my hand and correct with gentleness. He continues to teach me His ways of navigating this sea, and it is like nothing that other men told me it should be.
I am not proud of who I once was, and I often find it difficult to relive those days as an example to others. My Lord has forgiven me for my crimes and has wiped the charges from His record. He has redeemed me to serve a greater purpose.
I hope that you will join me on my voyage. Stay as long as you like. Observe and evaluate what you see. Join the crew if you feel comfortable. Take the time to earn my trust, and as my Captain guides me, let tell you the story of my treason, the glory of His rescue, and the joy of His redemption. As your own journey moves on, you will be faced with choices. Will you look to Him and set yourself aside? He will teach you and guide you gently if you can. Will you trust only in yourself for your own glory? If you are to be rescued, you will first be humbled, and it will hurt terribly. Are you unsure of where you stand? We need to talk.
2 Corinthians 5:17 - "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away, behold, the new has come!"
I prepared for the end, I laid on the deck crying and wondered how painful it would be to die. I considered taking my own life on my own terms rather than allow it to be taken from me. As I gave myself up for lost, the storm subsided. A Man I had never invited on my journey, but spoke of as if He had been to satisfy those on board, was at the wheel...
...and I was terrified by His presence.
He somehow avoided the rocks and righted the ship. All that was damaged seemed to be as fresh as the day she first touched the water. He made her new again. Humbly, I offered the True Captain my sword and begged Him to take my life as punishment for my crimes. Gently and kindly, He embraced me. "Now that I have your heart," He said, "I can make a good sailor out of you. Although there will be scars, I will heal the pain, and now I can use you to reach others. You have always been valuable beyond measure to me, and now you can experience the extent of My love."
Some people see me as a slave to my Captain, but I have been set free. Some say there is still mutiny in my heart, but I take every emotion to my Savior and He brings me comfort and encouragement. People wonder when I will tire of glorifying and praising my Lord, but He gives me strength and courage to continue each day.
The people that sail with me now know who I have been, they know who I am, and they know that they are two very different people. As my Captain has released the wheel back to me, He is never far away to guide my hand and correct with gentleness. He continues to teach me His ways of navigating this sea, and it is like nothing that other men told me it should be.
I am not proud of who I once was, and I often find it difficult to relive those days as an example to others. My Lord has forgiven me for my crimes and has wiped the charges from His record. He has redeemed me to serve a greater purpose.
I hope that you will join me on my voyage. Stay as long as you like. Observe and evaluate what you see. Join the crew if you feel comfortable. Take the time to earn my trust, and as my Captain guides me, let tell you the story of my treason, the glory of His rescue, and the joy of His redemption. As your own journey moves on, you will be faced with choices. Will you look to Him and set yourself aside? He will teach you and guide you gently if you can. Will you trust only in yourself for your own glory? If you are to be rescued, you will first be humbled, and it will hurt terribly. Are you unsure of where you stand? We need to talk.
2 Corinthians 5:17 - "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away, behold, the new has come!"
Monday, April 21, 2014
Treason and The Traitor - Part I
I set sail from the harbor with gentle winds and confidence as I lovingly looked over every detail of my ship. The vessel appeared to be finely crafted and able to handle the worst that the sea could muster. As I left the safety of that harbor and entered the open ocean, I recognized that I couldn't complete this voyage on my own.
So others joined me on this venture. All different kinds of people. Some taught me things I didn't know, others brought companionship, some that I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. How they got there, I'm not quite sure. As the journey grew longer, some left and others joined, each leaving behind something significant. Through my words, I told them they were equals, but through my actions, I showed them they were pieces on a chessboard to be manipulated.
Then the storms came; storms I should not have been going through. Confident in my ability to captain this vessel, I knew the fault could not be my own. Someone misread signs that the weather gave us. Things began to break. The mast was in danger of collapsing and the bolts holding the rudder in place threatened to rip through the wood. I skillfully righted the ship and saved her from sinking, but the damage was done. I could no longer trust those on board with me.
Following repairs and underway once again, I replaced my crew with others that seemed more capable, but as we weathered yet another storm, I grew skeptical and isolated myself from anyone that might bring harm to my ship. I began to grow insecure in my decision making. Those that I still kept on board questioned me.
I allowed the ship to become one with the sea; letting it be tossed and turned whichever way the wind blew and currents churned. Despite the warnings from my last faithful crew member, I allowed the ship to be swallowed in the hurricane. The rocks were in front of us, but in my pride, I would let no one else take the wheel. In my insecurity, I would not allow my vessel to be controlled by anyone but the sea, who had blinded me from the reality all around, yet I would not turn my eyes from its perceived beauty.
With the rocks just yards ahead, I wondered which one among us had sabotaged my voyage and led me to this place. I stormed through the ship, cutlass in hand, ready to take the life of the man who had betrayed me. Hard as I looked, there was no one left aboard. There, in the very back of the cargo hold, someone had scratched in the wood, "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Any hope of a successful voyage had ended because of the treason... and the traitor was me.
So others joined me on this venture. All different kinds of people. Some taught me things I didn't know, others brought companionship, some that I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. How they got there, I'm not quite sure. As the journey grew longer, some left and others joined, each leaving behind something significant. Through my words, I told them they were equals, but through my actions, I showed them they were pieces on a chessboard to be manipulated.
Then the storms came; storms I should not have been going through. Confident in my ability to captain this vessel, I knew the fault could not be my own. Someone misread signs that the weather gave us. Things began to break. The mast was in danger of collapsing and the bolts holding the rudder in place threatened to rip through the wood. I skillfully righted the ship and saved her from sinking, but the damage was done. I could no longer trust those on board with me.
Following repairs and underway once again, I replaced my crew with others that seemed more capable, but as we weathered yet another storm, I grew skeptical and isolated myself from anyone that might bring harm to my ship. I began to grow insecure in my decision making. Those that I still kept on board questioned me.
I allowed the ship to become one with the sea; letting it be tossed and turned whichever way the wind blew and currents churned. Despite the warnings from my last faithful crew member, I allowed the ship to be swallowed in the hurricane. The rocks were in front of us, but in my pride, I would let no one else take the wheel. In my insecurity, I would not allow my vessel to be controlled by anyone but the sea, who had blinded me from the reality all around, yet I would not turn my eyes from its perceived beauty.
With the rocks just yards ahead, I wondered which one among us had sabotaged my voyage and led me to this place. I stormed through the ship, cutlass in hand, ready to take the life of the man who had betrayed me. Hard as I looked, there was no one left aboard. There, in the very back of the cargo hold, someone had scratched in the wood, "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Any hope of a successful voyage had ended because of the treason... and the traitor was me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)